Is this really news?

Our local Fox affiliate aired a non-news consumer report story tonight that was simply ridiculous. Get this, Paer Shredders are DANGEROUS, epecially to your kids (and pets too)! Especially the cross cutting kind. Apparently, the shredder is simply waiting to lure your offspring and chop off their fingers. What evil little, umm…inamimate objects?

Isn’t a big part of being a parent being able to watch your kids, and figure out what poses a danger to them? If you don’t know this (and I’m talking to you lady who swore off shredders because YOU LET YOUR 3 YEAR OLD HELP YOU SHRED PAPERS), then what are you doing reproducing? Thank you FOX 5 for reminding me why I don’t watch the evening news.

I don’t mean to sound callous, accidents happen, and some aren’t preventable and those are really tragic. This was just filler.